* Gasps!!!*

i cant imagine catching the show 康熙来了! guess who are the star guests today???

i'm soo excited now!! they are my all time fav 童星 ,释小龙 和 郝劭文！！！

i've always loved to watch these two boys' show when i was young! their shows are cute, hilarious, action packed and more!!!

if you were to ask me to watch those old shows or movies again, flood me with them!

it's always shi xiao long, a.k.a. Ashton Chen (just found out) that i'm fascinated by! he's smart, cute and a kungfu expert at such young age! i loved him for his cute little face!

Now that he's older, he's got a really sturdy body side and still that boyish yet adult face. he's grown from a cute boy to a handsome fine man. he's got slightly long hair now. i would still prefer his short and forehead-showing hairstyle. he looks smarter than his emo hairstyle which i tot would be better if its tidied, and more moisturized. :)

he's really good looking...so please stay away from him!!

haha!!!

right...me and my fascinations. I'm joking abt the staying away from him. but seriously, i did get swayed a lil. i even thought of going to learn kung fu. the shaolin set up by his granddads had accomodation and just pay money can learn kungfu le...

wow...a person who doesnt exercise at all like me to go shaolin temple to learn kungfu? i dun think i can survive the first day man! hahaha!!!

ah.... today is such a beautiful sunday!

i had my shower and washed my hair with Asience nice frangrant shampoo, i felt oh so nice!

although i had cramps, but after putting heater pad on my tummy and nap for about 20-25 mins, i woke up feeling the sun light so inviting.

Doing my homework infront of the computer had never felt that great before, especially with the sun peeking through my laced curtain down on my keyboard!

oh, and i can smell the aroma slowly rolling in and seeping through openings in my room. it is the the smell of turkey and ham! yes, i feel as if i am some little girl in a cottage, doing what i like, and when detect the aroma coming from the kitchen, stop what she's doing and ran into the kitchen and check out the yummy food!

我觉得我很幸福！ i'm blessed. :D

i'm loving sundays!

today went to meet up my primary school friends. Felt super super wierd! I hate e feeling. Cos wad i spoke, pple seems to .give me e 'er, ok..... :-s'
But we went settler's cafe and played games like ugly doll and quelf. I dun like quelf cos it embarrasses oneself. Esp me, i felt like i was e stupid one. Not tat i am doing more stupid moves than them but i am always e one who cant think. :-( oh wells, those who came are: gabriella, ching li, jessica, ivon, berlin, fang you, yixi,glenn, erick,kenneth,kewei,jianheng.

wow. today 20th was the school's carnival and boy! it was a fun saturday!

i went to school for cog neuro and yeap, we had our brak at 11 and for 30 mins instead of the usual 10-15 mins! woohoO! they sold food but it was very little and not fulfillng. still i like the crispy fried spring roll by the canteen aunties. :D:D
They have people coming in to sell candies and cookies in super super nice packagings and they even had those hamper like sugar coated chocolate cookies?? i dunno but it looked real tempting to buy and eat theM!

Previously, Qy and I sort of talked abt the girl in the biz class she was in with. the girl who is swedish but a mixed. the girl who looked oh so lovely with cute curly long hair. she's petite! she and her gang of ang moh friends set up a stall too, selling their home made cookies, choco, breads and even...biscotta? i cant recall the name.. it was nicely decorated and packaged... even they themselves were in very nice film sequined, christmas designed black Tee! nice! it's really nice and i'd say they have designer brain?? loL!!

anyway, Alvin bought like $100 coupons?? my goodness. he wont be able to finish! haha!! but anyway, i bought my own, $10. so we as in Alvin and ourselves(students) gathered to eat and talked. i really like that idea, :D.

during lunch. at around 1.30, we went out to eat spring roll again. as well as tching tng. Siti bought a cookie from the ang moh girls' stall and we wanted ask if the marble cake was nice, the curly haired girl offered us the tester. :D

nice....and i mean her. she's pretty with really nice skin complexion! i thought her voice would be kinda sweet. but hurhurhur! she had a rather cool and tomboyish voice!!! haha! it's rather...cool and attractive. :D no no.. i no lesbian.
she's got the style!

Then, Siti and i met Concetta!!! oh my, she's in skirt!? and she's wearing heels. :D she did this hug with kissing as a form polite greeting with Siti. i thought that meant as 'long time no see, let's hug'that kind of meaning??

but after that, i stoned there. She finished and she looked at me and came forward. oops!! ok... i should know that the meaning i tot was a wrong one.. hehe!! so i just do the same.. :P

i duno how! but i just be a ccopycat then! hahahahahaha it's my first time doing this kind of greeting! oh my god!! i couldnt believe! she smells quite nice and her hair was plastic like..hahahaha!
cos of the spray or cream she used for her curls. :D

right, we saw Deborah Hazel with this part time 4th year student sitting tgt.... apparently she left early for lecture just to be at the carnival, with him? he's Wayne?Dwayne?? dun care la


den, guess who i saw when we were going back to class? Robyn Youie!! my psychopathology tutor! NIce!!! She brought her whole family to the carnival! 1 oldest son, eh..forgot name liao.. nathaN? 2 younger daughthers, natalie and ....i cant rmb.. she intro-ed me as what i am related to her... like some adult to adult. haha¬!! nice parental teaching. but she apparently forgot abt her husband who was standing behind her. haha!
but her husband sounds nice. a really nice nice family!!!



after school, well school apparently ended really early today. cos it's supposed to be a Free and Easy tutorial but becos both of us didnt bring laptop, a wonderful day that we both din !!! woohoo! haha!! so we had to go home. I saw many pple gathered around the dunking machine!!
Guess who's on the platform!!!???


Frankie Yee! LOL! it's funny how he fell into the water! hahaha! everyone was happy and they clapped becos the one throwing the ball had quite a few tries before Frankie was dunked! hahaha!

Then guess who i saw again!!??! Ching!!! I asked him why wasnt he on the dunking machine and he said,'no, why? you really want me to be there? ' i of course, said nah,. no money too. haha!

he sounded as if he's willing to be there on the dunking machine for me.. hahaha!! no la... i'm sure he's doing for charity. it's $5 per game. i spent them all on food! nice chap there. :D
oh , he always asked me if i'm going home.. and he asked like 2-3 times when i bid goodbye to him at the carnival. haha!! i wonder what he's thinking abt.

Right. the choco late i bought in the end with Alvin's 1dollar broke one of my brace!! damn it!! argh!!! Their silvery coated sugar sweet on the small chocoloate cookies were the hardest sweet i've ever eateN!! darn! i din know man! i heard crack only...so i tot itw as the sweet that had cracked. i'm so gonna make the dentist angry with me.. tell me what reason i should give! hahaha!


ok...those who missed out on the carnival, you are so losing out on the happy saturday feeling!
seriously! it's never been such a wonderful happy saturday to me before! it's so different from a saturday where you go out with your friends. i guess its the PEOPLE and the activities they are doing that makes the whole atmosphere a joyous and a celebrating one!!!

Merry Christmas, and a Happy New Year 2009!!!

will be having a class gathering on 26, a day before presentation abt dyslexia for cog neuro.

i should go despite the imminent presentation that i always perform badly becos two times or 3 times of the gathering i wasn't there at all. i must be there somehow. although i dun really talk to them...i guess i need to show my face to let them know i exist. hahahaha

hv been slacking. and i need to increase my speed .that is not to be in a daze..... dunno why my eyes cloud..and i need to do that cartoon action of shaking my head to bring me back to reality.


i need to get this sem over and done with and start planning what to do .

Finally, i heaved a sigh of relief. my I/O psych essay finally done! although i was late by a 1 mins.. i'm glad that it was done. now looking at my time tables, i realised that i aint got much time left to study for the revision part. plus 2 presentations an 1 essay coming along. on and 1 www to be done. i guess i'm giving up on chasing another sales for this last month. sigh.. i dunno how am i going to finish all up!

and while i'm browsing thru fb, i realised that the debators or rather just the 4 who are often in contact with each other met up. i guess i wasnt their kind, so i wasnt called. despite telling 2 of the frens to call me when they are meeting up. but i guess i shall just give up this frenship i have with them. why reciprocate when they dun even care abt ur existence?? but i'd say i treasure those days with them. it was pure fun. but now that everyone's 'growing' up, i shall put my focus on older pple to gain maturity and see thru these obstacles i face in life. or rather..obstacles related to frenship.

how funny to talk abt group cohesion for my I/O psych when i sucks at doing and understanding that!

well, was it becos of a stupid joke that made them thought i am still holding on? damn no! i guess the reason goes back to the post before this. its all abt me.

today Alvin and Ian were funny. esp Ian cos he talked abt a peson with IV drip goes to sky dive to get their 'natural form of euthanasia'. MeiLing brought this up, so we kinda link link link and to choice of death. LOL!
Alvin was laughing his head off. as for me? my lips off.. they hurt!!! ouch*

yeah..den talk abt Ian leaving Lyn alone, and returning her to him next sat.. but Alvin din want to keep her that long. so Ian suggested to put her at post office in a box or something like that?

hahahah!! it was funny!! and it's not in joking manner you know???? it was like plain talking, seriously too! hahah!!! you can imagine how funny and popular a guy can be!?!?

but i'd say mean la.. poor lyn. they were so evil!! lol! but all are pure fun. that's what i like to enjoy in a school in a friendship, in life... in everything we do!!


i guess i'm deprived of social life. can someone even suggest to me what to do to spice up my social life?? i need to know more frens.


as for talking abt guys,, or reincarnating into a guy next life.. i shall continue when there's a chance. dun wanna bore readers(if theres any). :D

Read my friend's blog again, after like so many months.. 1 year later.. dating back from jun 07.

i guess i wasnt that significant as a friend to him as compared to other friends he had and yes of course i know that.

those who really knows me, must have guessed that i aint got many frens. hmmm.

i do not even dare to hope that he'll treat me as some good fren..but just normal friend. but i guessed it was lesser than a normal one. i read back and he said he missed his frens...and i read twice..no mention of my name.
ah wells, at least i'm a lil' glad that he had my link to my blog on his page. i should be contented, i guess. :S

i guess i wasnt open enough when i'm with my group of frens. but seriously, do you know why?? do you know why i wasnt open when i'm with them but yet so open with my other group of friends?? becos they are different. they are my best groupss but i'd say i'm closer to jcu ones. i'm happy that i've got qy, annie, jessie and wisnu. well, wisnu drifted. sad...

they are nice to me. eh./.. i hope i'm good to them too. i hope i have brought joy to them...but they said that i'm boring.. too serious.. am i? i guess on both occasion i was tired and i cant speak due to lip inflammation. but how bout other times?? i guess i paled in comparison to jessie and qy when it comes to jokes.. i can only laugh my brains out..no contribution.. ok ok.. i'll try my best.

so what abt other groups?

i guess they are too matured for me. is it?? well it's ok that they are matured... i should be matured too cos afterall i'm 20 already... the numbah 2 is out! damn. but i guess my foundation that i've built with them was too careful...untill a barrier was formed between me and them.( eng: they and me ?? iono) yes.. i was too careful with words, in fear that i'll speak the wrogn words at the wrong time, dampening the spirits. i guess i always do that. when i can wisen up???
yes..too careful until i dare not speak... thus, making myself the odd one out among the chatty ones. well all are very interactive, except for me.

i guess i'm always the extra one. and i'm glad that they still ask me out occasionally. :) yes.. not all the time and that i've known it long ago.

oh and also, grades?? and personality plays a part?? man, i feel like i'm writing another essay. but nevertheless, essays like these are never tiring or irritating becos no reference needed but just jotting down what i think and feel...which my brain offers its juice readily like a woman to a man. or the man to the woman, if the woman is evil. MUAHAHA. ok... back to reality.

oh...just a note, i realised that i like to day dream alot. when writing lab report or essay gets too boring for me and i can squeeze any more juice out of that dried up brain, i start to fantasize 'ifs' scenarios. nothing dirty nothing wierd.. but normal. :D

yeah grades, i guess i was the dumbest. but ..hmm to recall, that is not really the factor, but rather..yes.. back to square one, openness---personality. i am not like my other fren, who is also part of the group( but not hanging out that kind.. but just talking part), speaking what i feel like saying and laughing.
i laugh too when i speak..but the questions and words that came out carried a tone of cautious. and yes.. they are dumb too. i guess i wasnt racking my brain enough to talk abt topics we can talk abt. seriously, the things they talk abt were things i dun dabble in. i guess both were in the big schools and the env is so much diff from mine..so there's a common topic. and becos

they are close already, they can talk more abt things they'd shared. so the theory here kind of resembles 'the rich gets richer and the poor gets poorer'.

still rmbing that time, for SS1112 i think..when i teamed up with Sam and Lyn, we were supposed to talk abt issues that are assigned.. they are general i guess but such a focused generality??

twice i thnk, my fren cried cos the topic touched that raw nerve. and once my other friend was talking abt her fears that she really dunno what to do. anyway.. i interviewed the latter and i was soo embarrasssed becos i dunno what to ask as an interviewer, esp when she needed one the most at that time. Sorry Sam and Lyn.(dun bother to figure which one was the latter. :P)
yes ..and for me... the first time i broke down when i talked abt the issue of 'friends'.

damn it, i duno why from that time onwards, whenever i read abt or hear or see anything abt my group of friends, eh.. i guess without me in the pic, i kinda get really sad?? i get really to the brink of a cup full of water. seriously, previously when i hadnt talked abt this, i was fine... sad but not that sad.. just, 'ok...' fullstop. now, i get soooooooooo sensitive!!! i should stop these whining cries wannabe.

i must be strong. talking abt strong, should girls be that strong. ok this is another issue.
should i be that strong? until guys leave me so far away? i guess i'm too independent, until guys feel as if they shouldnt even need to help me when i thought they could. help i guess, showing off their masculinity. e.g. like helping me to refill a cup of water. hmm i guess i was brought up such taht i do all things by myself. so i dun dare to even ask a guy...and even girls to help me to do anything. i feel really bad if i asked. cos i dunno how much of 'thank you' i should say to show my gratitude for their effort!

you know what?? i really mean it when i say thank you. unlike some 'thank you' i felt from others.
well. perhaps they meant it from their heart too. but it's just that it's expressed differently. I gauged too much i supposed.. i think for pple too much.
self- imposing on my freedom so much that i am too scared to venture out of my comfort zone. when can i learn to let go of that lifebuoy? i know i can swim but why am i still feeling insecure?

i need to be challenged but why cant i accept it with open arms? i guess what i'm doing now is doing what i know i should do to self-improve. am i doing what i like?? i'm a mixed person


i like challenges but scared to accept it. i guess i mustnt know that i'm accepting a challenge. if not.. i'll know that i'm threading on one.

yesterday had my lips all swollen and peeling and guess what? had a wedding dinner to attend too!!

so i wore a really pretty dress..but i had to run across the road back to home cos my dad wants to eat..and we are running late..
den one guy from the pau shop said, 'wear so pretty dun run, will fall down.' so sweet right? but before that.. when i came down from my house to the carpark, he asked, 'wah wear so nice, where are you going?' cos my lips were swollen, so i just smiled back. that was sweet dude! i was happy.

at the dinner, i felt i was like a model lor.. tsktsk! muahaha!! ok! dun laugh!! cos you know why? all are malaysians, and girls there are not as tall as me when wear high heels. i was wearing high heels la.. haha. so i felt i was tall.. hmm.. in fact i felt as if i was that talll without the heels!

so i strut with large model like steps back from toilet to my seat. woohoo..
and i did that way when i left the place ...wow!!

a model for a day. ;)

dam n damn!! i accidentally deleted my post!!!!!!!!! argh!!!

ok. i was expressing how happy am i and how grateful am i to Jo cos she invited me too to join her, hs, ws and yh....plus her 2 other gfs to Harry's Bar at Novena sq!

i lamented how close it was and yet so far cos i could just walked to it and enjoy
but i got work to do.. guilty for rejecting her invitation.

den i talked abt Alvin, cos today talked to him tgt with esther and veronica. i like his knowledge, his humour and how confident he carried himself..
plus his voice and accent that made him so westernised..so english. so high class? reminds of a rich english educated family background. like those rich girl who speaks with accent and so popular.. etc..

den finally saw wisnu in class.. sad case la.. he s tarted smoking after breaking up with his gf..

*so sad, so sad... sorry seems to be the hardest word*

Yesterday ate pepper lunch... the beef slice with hamburger patty. woah! it was delicious man! i love it. and guess what? the place my mom and bro and me sat wass just beside the stage where the the kids central show THE WINX CLUB girls were performing!! oh my goodness!! They were sooooo pretty!
even more pretty when they changed into their winx costume.. those with wings?? oh my... it's just soooooooo pretty!!! of course all are beauties too!
after the show... i was so fascinated with Winx and i felt light headed.. felt as if i was part of the Winx club... flying off !